Do I ?

I’m staring at the ceiling
Hoping to find an answer to my feelings
I feel the clutter inside me
It drowns me like a drop in the sea

Why is that I feel so restless
My mind seem elsewhere
My heart is crying
If only I knew what I was meant to do
If only I had a reason to start again and new

I look for a meaning
I search for the truth
The empty silence, the blank walls
I feel like I need an awakening call

There is a void within my soul
A pain that doesn’t let go
It’s the numbness within my heart
That feels like it could tear me apart

I wonder what is really wrong
I wonder the core of my existence
Do I really need to be alive?
Do I really need to survive?
Do I make a difference to anybody?
Or am’ I just another nobody…